The Not-so Sacred Web Book of John Not the Apostle
Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars... Yada Yada...
Here's the truth!
The Geography of Woman
Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa, half discovered, half wild, fertile and naturally beautiful!
Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe, well developed and open to trade, especially for someone with cash.
Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain, very hot, relaxed and convinced of her own beauty.
Between 36 and 40, a woman is like Greece, gently aging but still a warm and desirable place to visit.
Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain, with a glorious and all conquering past.
Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Israel, has been through war and doesn't make the same mistakes twice, takes care of business.
Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada, self-preserving, but open to meeting new people.
After 70, she becomes Tibet, wildly beautiful, with a mysterious past and the wisdom of the ages...only those with an adventurous spirit and a thirst for spiritual knowledge visit there.
The Geography of Man
Between 1 and 70, a man is like Iran, Ruled by Nuts!
Some Things Seem Impossible, Something Are!
A man was riding his Harley along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head...
In a booming voice, the Lord said "Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish."
The biker pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want."
The Lord said, "Your request is selfish.
Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking! I'd have to completely re-terraform the bottom of the Pacific. Let's see... I guess I could make a series of islands to link the sections of the bridge, or maybe I could just plant massive beams... but then, that could compromise the maritime currents I have set in place! I can do it of course, but it is hard for me to justify such work just to satisfy such selfish desires.
Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind."
The biker thought about it for a long time.
Finally, he said, "Lord, I wish that I, and all men, could understand women; I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy
The Lord paused, then replied, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge?"
Thank You For Reading
The Not-So Sacred Book of John Not The Apostle!
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